I need not write that she is the most unrelatable First Lady this nation has ever had. Having said that, however, she could make a move that would allow us to consider her at least remotely human if she explored the possibility of hiring a robot to handle her “Eiffel duties”.
I can see Melania endorsing a sleek, stainless‑steel humanoid, devoid of emotion and utterly one-dimensional, with zero sexual accessibility. A robot capable of nodding politely, maintaining a neutral expression for hours, wearing large hats that are not even seen at British weddings, while delivering the phrase “I really don’t care, do u?” in 47 languages. In other words, a perfect fit as a fill-in for Melaina.
Her motivation would be completely understandable. With Donald Trump experiencing and demonstrating more proof in his public appearances that his frontal-temporal dementia is becoming worse, with his words and behavior becoming more erratic and increasingly unpredictable, who can blame her for wanting to enlist what might be called FLOTUS 2? With Trump acting like a rabid Roomba let loose in a large house, a nut who clearly requires constant supervision, who among us would blame her for opting for an automated solution?
The robot, I suspect, could utterly fool Trump if it were able to withstand 900 seconds of continuous awkwardness, being able to detect when a conversation is about to turn to your husband’s sexual infidelities and just power down, and have the ability to slap his hand when he gets too near.
If this were to actually work, I can see Melania opting out of those awkward events like ceremonial ribbon‑cuttings and, even more dreaded, conversations with Eric Trump. Frankly, if she pulls this off, I can see House Speaker Mike Johnson asking the First Lady where she bought her model. Does it come in evangelical hues, too?
Caffeinated Politics 
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